We're like a lot better than the average bears
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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