New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
You have to summon your inner elephant
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
