At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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