he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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