Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Dignity is for republicans.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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