Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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