i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
