In the future we'll all be gay
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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