Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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