I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
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