and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
bring money and cleavage
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
