Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I'm always down for nudity.
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