I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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