I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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