There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
