wrigley field is MILF paradise
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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