Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Randomize
