i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
