We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
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Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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