I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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