i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
