i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
