Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize