my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize