I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize