My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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