That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
