We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
