If i come over, it means nothing
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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