Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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