What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
