Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You took a bar mat shot.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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