sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
