I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
