u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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