I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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