woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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