I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
