No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just googled if crying burns calories
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
