Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
