I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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