There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
