who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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