last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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