About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
