his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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