the new term for farting is butt boxing.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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