at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
