I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
