My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize