She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm sobbing to NWA
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