The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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